I started the assignment by doing a bit of a mind map - this was quite familiar territory for me. As part of my day job, I sometimes conduct management training. One of the exercises I include is called "Personal Maps" which helps trainees (and co-workers when applied in the workplace) to get to know each other and find common ground.
I tried to make connections; I had also just finished watching a TV series called "Cloak and Dagger" based off of the Marvel comic series of the same name. Duality and the balance of light and dark, hopes and fears featured prominently. So I had this at the back of my mind when doing the mind map. Especially how I could appreciate all aspects of my personality - stuff which we sometimes feel is a 'negative' aspect can have positive qualities, and makes up the whole person
I trialled some potential ideas by making thumbnail sketches. I had looked at other examples on the blogs of other OCA students. There were a variety of approaches but all seemed to include some representation of the student's favourite activities. This felt too much like a cliche to me. I was conscious that I have a tendency to put too much into things, and I wanted to concentrate on simplicity.
When I got to the final thumbnail, it struck me that the pillar I had drawn looked like a totem pole, and that gave me a flash of inspiration. I looked online to do some holistic research about totem poles, what there were for and what the animal representations meant. One reference described a totem as "A means of personal or spiritual identity" and this really resonated with me.
"A means of personal or spiritual identity"
It took me some time to work out what animals I wanted to choose for my totem. Referring back to my original mind map I could have had a proverbial menagerie of totem heads. In the end I opted for:
Raven - thought to represent introspection and self-knowledge. The Raven is also thought to represent mischievousness in some cultures. I chose the raven because it resonated with my journey to understand myself, especially given my journey tackling atypical mental health. I also wanted it to represent the Dark of my psyche, that melancholy which I have been ashamed of in the past which I am starting to own.
Otter - thought to represent agility, playfulness and creativity. Even before this assignment I thought the otter to be my 'spirit animal'. Agility means something specific to me - I am an Agile Coach by profession, and 'being agile' in the workplace has been a big part of my life for over a decade. The playfulness aspect represents not only my love of games (in many formats) but the way I have re-engaged with simple play since my son was born. Creativity - well, I wouldn't be doing this if it wasn't for that aspect!
Wolf - I thought this might be an aggressive symbol, but apparently it often represents family, perseverance, loyalty and success. Family is extremely important to me - I don't have a huge amount of friends, and that's because I count the friends I do have as an extension of my 'pack'. I might be a lone operator sometimes, but I always know my family has my back.
I also did some research into the Haida People of British Columbia - they have a very distinctive style to their artwork, and I was considering if this was something I could / wanted to emulate in my final piece. In the end I decided not to, I as I felt the totem should be my style (as it is now). The Haida artwork is really cool, however, and I think I might revisit it later.
The next stage was to try and get the concept to a finished state. I explored a couple of compositions. I found it hard to do more than a few, as I felt very strongly about the composition I wanted. This is something I am going to have to work on, as I need to challenge assumptions I make in my head.
I did all of the work digitally, starting with roughs in 'pencil' using a guideline of a straight column to align all the different heads. I kept using my reference research / sketches as well as other images I found online for specific references (for example, what the wing feathers looked like, it was important to me to get the angles right). I also used this time to start building up a reference library of images.
After the pencils I inked the lines with a smooth ink brush. I've been doing a lot of Inktober this month, and that rubbed off in my choice to outline in ink I think. After the inks I created blocks of colour (called 'flats' by comic artists) for the main areas of the image. This allows me to quickly select areas later. I chose any old colour, and picked a palette at random. I actually really like the vivid colours, and it was cool to see the work in a more pop-art style. One the flats were done, I copied them and then changed the colours to a pure representation of the colours I wanted.
It wan't important for me to get it looking like wood at this stage - I needed the colours as if they were in a 'vacuum'. Which basically means if light, texture and structure were not factors to consider. The last stage was to add a series of masks on top of this layer that add light and shadow. I also used texture and a colour mask to give the effect of wood. The last steps were to then 'paint in' the light and shadow onto the totem pole and double check the text for composition and colour. I used a textured brush to add texture to the image, and contrast with the clean and flat background.
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